Chronicles of Shade’s love mishaps

Many ladies these days believe all what a guy needed them for in relationship is sex. So true! “Virtually, all men are at first got attracted to a girl by her physical make-up and this directly links to sex” as opined by one study about men’s brain. But that is not the reason why men tend to leave girls after having sex with her for the first time.

A very good friend of mine once shared her experience with me about how guys have used and dumped her. Shade is a lady you can’t help but to wish she were yours. Even her female counterparts wished God made them as magnificent as Shade was. She said: “If I have to count one, two, three, I have dated up to five guys within the period of 4 years. The first guy I dated was just the type of guy I had wanted both in his physical appearance and otherwise. When we started our relationship I was very much into him but was very cautioned not to be seen as a cheap one. I gave him love and everything I could give a man but not sex. He usually pestered, but I wouldn’t bulge.

“After about a year plus, I was ready to have him break my hymen. It was a surprise to him – it came on a day he least expected. We had sex and never regretted it. But what made me to feel bad about my action was that after that day, all what we seemed to have built over the year began to hit the rock. The calling, chatting and caring manner that I so loved about him seemed to be waning, I thought at first that it was a normal not until the frequency of our communication slowed down–if I don’t make the calling, he won’t bother to call or ask about me. Just after a short while, we stopped talking and, boom! we broke up. I had to let him know I needed a break-up and he didn’t give a damn to ask why. I was pained!

“After the breakup with my first guy, I found myself in another relationship not quite long. We started as casual friends online. One thing led to the other. We began dating. I never wanted what happened in my first relationship repeated in this new one. I was of the opinion that what made my first relationship crash was because I was a bit difficult when it comes to the romantic aspect of the relationship. So I tried to avoid that pitfall and tended to be more romantic than before with the guy. Again, after the first sex with him, he did like the first man”.

“The same thing repeated itself with my other three dates. I began to wonder whether I am having some spiritual problem, if not why will I be sexed and dump by every man that sleeps with me?

Shade’s experience, you will agree is an everyday experience. This is the reason why I think many ladies tend to label all guys to be bad. Sleeping too soon with a guy won’t make him flake, likewise prolonging the time to have sex with a guy is not a ticket for the guy to stay; in fact, the latter is the worst in most cases I have seen.

The life of a man is not as complicated as that of his female counterpart. If you ask a female why she fell in love with her man, she will surely talk about both the physical aspect of him and the non-physical part. Same response can be received if the guy is asked the same question. However, where things get to be muddled up by a female about guys is about this cliché that men are moved by what they see. Ladies then tend to attach so much believe in this and give more attention to their physical well-being more than the non-physical aspect of their life. If you pay less priority to the sub-conscious aspect of your life in a relationship, it will always cause you more hurt than joy, because, it is just telling a guy that you have nothing else to offer in a relationship than what his libido is craving for.

In an article authored by Mark Rosenfeld, the author wrote that the non-physical aspect of a woman’s life is as important as her physical make-up, except when it comes to sex. This, in a word, summed up the overall reason why guys tend to disappear like a clockwork after sex. Other reasons include natural causes, which no matter what, you will likely get ex-ed after been sexed; believing in friends advise on how to handle your man; forming what you are not; and seeing man as the alpha and omega of your financial troubles.

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